Rules of the Titus @ 8 weeks

1. Please don't cover my feet with a blanket. I do not like this and will kick it off.

2. Bouncers are good ONLY if they vibrate.

3. I enjoy sleeping sideways in my bassinet, even if I do look all squished up.

4. I will sleep when I want to sleep. Go ahead try to wake me up when I want to be sleeping.

5. Someday, Mom, you will stop squeezing newborn onesies over my big nogin, in the mean time every time you do I will scream.

6. It is not my fault Mom fails more often than Dad at putting the diaper on correctly AND making sure everything is pointing in the right direction.

7. Go ahead, put me in a nice outfit, take me in public and don't put a bib on me - I will spit up. ALOT.

8. When I am chewing on my entire hand - it most likely means I am hungry. Seriously, I am trying to eat my whole hand - feed me. Or I will scream.

9. I like it when Dad "sssssshhhhhhhhhhhh's" me. It calms me down almost immediately. Mom, you are okay at it, but Dad is the master.

10. The carseat. Oh, the carseat. It is great, sometimes, and only when it's moving. Please don't leave me in it for longer than a millisecond with out it moving or I will scream again.

11. I love snugling up in Dad and Mom's arms or on thier chest to fall asleep, but you keep putting me in my bassinet before I fall asleep. Not fair.

12. I refuse to coo or ooo, or make sweet little baby noises. I am a man, Mom, and I will only grunt and squawk. Be happy with the smiles you get.