Friday, September 5, 2008

It takes...

I've recently been chewing on the saying "it takes a village to raise a child" I am not referring to HRC's book or speech. At all, just chewing on the saying. More so I'm faced with Brion is one person, I am one person - Together we are one. So we add up to two, somehow. Not even close to a village.

Right now we have one child. Titus has grandmas and grandpas, he even has a great-grandma and great-grandpa and a great-great grandma. (Yes, so far the women in my family live forever). However, Brion's side of the family resides in other states (mainly Texas and Oklahoma, although Nana lives in Washington). Mine lives here. And we're close and we see each other at least weekly, however they are not involved in the day to day raising of Titus. It is Brion and I. And that is "normal". 

 As a children's ministry director I believe in "partnering with parents to encourage them to grow, love and disciple their children." Mainly because I and the ministry team see a child a maximum of 3.5 hours a week. The amount of time a parent spends their son or daughter, talking and walking life with them is at least 10 times that each week. And that's a minimum, of a kid that's say in sports till 5pm every night. So all we can do is partner. We can't do it and it's not our responsibility - its the parent's. 

And as I imagine Brion and I's future in ministry I realize more and more how important that partnership can be. Children's Ministry at Hauser by no means takes the place of parent's spiritual guidance but I am looking forward to the partnership Titus, Brion and I will have with the ministries each one of us will be in now and as we grow older. Hopefully continuing to further us on in our walk of faith so that we can be a more Godly family, Godly wife, mother, father, husband, child. 

I might not have a village but I have a church. And with in that church I have village, call it extended family call it whatever you want - it's my village that is going to partner with us to raise our child. It's not an equal partnership, and maybe support is a better word. But our church will always be there. 

I am reading Grace-based Parenting and I read something in it today that struck me...

One of the primary roles that God gave parents is to create adults who reflect His heart. A family is, without a doubt, the most effective and efficient vehicle to produce the kind of people who can move confidently into the adult world and have a redemptive impact on the culture- that's what we are supposed to be doing. 

So why aren't we?

Why is the world we're living in getting more and more secular? Why have we gotten to the point that our culture has become extremely antagonistic toward us living out our faith in the public arena? Why has our culture turned more hedonistic? There are many explanations that people offer as answers to these questions. The standard one is to blame Satan, but that doesn't add up. He hasn't been sleepwalking for the past two thousand years and suddenly awakened. There was something holding him back. The was one fortress that he had a difficult time penetrating: a good, solid family. Parents armed with little more that a vibrant relationship with God consistently served as the ideal springboard for great people. So something changed....

The whole thought just struck me. The idea that we (our culture) had been fighting down the devil with the family... and we've slowly let him in. 

I witness this all over in families in ministry. In conversations with parents, and teens and kids and especially in the teens - when they are in the age to be owning their faith, steps away from becoming adults and they are miles away from being an adult that reflects God's heart. 

It breaks my heart. I believe it the fault of the parents but I do not let the church off the hook. For not holding families accountable. For not calling them out. 

The name of our new mom's group at Hauser is 242 and this is from 2 Timothy 4:2 and three words have struck the core of me from this verse:

CORRECT, REBUKE AND ENCOURAGE

I think church's in 2008 are guilty of NOT doing this. I think we encourage to often with correcting or rebuking. The following has also struck me to the core...

WITH GREAT PATIENCE AND CAREFUL INSTRUCTION

Patience is a scary word. There's a good ol funny thought that comes with patience for me. It's a good giggle I get. Don't ask God for patience unless you are prepared for him to teach you patience. I think I kicked Brion one time when he was praying and asked God to give us patience. I even have some people in my life that are very own personal Patience Professors - I am convinced God has put them in my life to teach me patience. 

Yet this verse says with GREAT patience. That's lots of patience. Not just a little not just the bare minimum. But with great patience. 

So I am have been convicted of correcting, rebuking, encouraging with great patience and careful instruction. What does this look like? I am not sure exactly, but He'll show me...

And I sure blog a whole lot while my husband is away. And my downstairs neighbors slams her door ALOT - another patience professor in my life. 

1 comment:

Ashley said...

great post! I think "grace based parenting" has a lot of similarities to "Shepherding a child's heart". It seems like a great book. I try to think over this verse on a daily basis (along with a few others) and it always helps me to stop... take a minute... and think about my actions and whether or not they contain great patience and careful instruction. It's a good one to check in on yourself with.

SOOOO excited for tomorrow!!